Who's Approval?

     Who am I trying to live for? To whom am I trying to prove myself? Who's approval do I really care about? Who am I trying to impress? Who is receiving my life?

     I've been hit with these questions in this morning's reading. They caused a convicting feeling in my stomach, and have forced me to reflect on my life and how I've been living it.

     I've always been a person who, when I'm around people I'm comfortable with, enjoys making others laugh. I want people to be happy. I try not to be cynical about things, though I am, and I try the most part to be a person who people want to like. So far, I've always thought that there was nothing wrong with this. I figured if I can be a lovable person who brings happiness, that is something that would allow people to see Jesus. As time went on though, I slowly lost myself in trying to win approvals, rather than trying to make others laugh.

     The Apostle Paul writes to the Galatians early in his letter that he is trying to win Christ's approval. He says that if he was still trying to win the approval of men, then he wouldn't be a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:10). "Is that what I've been doing? Haven't I just been trying to make people laugh so that they could like me? What effort have I put in to receive The Lord's approval?" Thoughts raced through my head as I realized what I've been doing the past couple of months. I have realized that I needed to change.

     There is a happy balance though. Living for the approval of God does not mean disregard the hearts of those around you, you just have to check where your allegiance is at. Christ preached hope and love. Loving others and being a light of joy and hope is the life we ought to live. It's in living that life that we must remember that it's Christ who is our source and leader. It's Him who we must come back to, no one else. 

     I've realized that there is One who deserves my life to be lived for Him. My wanting of being able to be a happy and peaceful person is possible, I just can't let my passion for approval travel to anyone else other than Christ Himself.